by Thick John
If you want a taste of villagist life then head over to this way.
The 92nd biennial Feed Your Faces festival got up and chomping yesterday with all kinds of grub up for grabs – and its almost all free!
For some reasons all the local restaurants, shops, suppliers and WI groups in the area think it would be a good idea to “showcase” the food they have on offer and they all give it away and don’t charge.
Some stuff you have to stump up for, but what’s the point when there’s all this free food?
Anyway this year we’ve got all sorts – not the sweets, right, but loads of different varieties of food that reflect what it means to be a villagist in the modern era.
The festival takes place in the open-air around the village green, plus at various establishments dotted around the place. So you can feed your way around the village – and stop at my boozer, the Bedknobs & Broomsticks, for a few jars before stuffing your face again.
We’ve got the full-on al fresco dining experience courtesy of some tramps:
There will be all sorts of party-type grub ready to be scoffed.
If you’ve got a sweet-tooth or even a savoury bent then head down to the village pond where there are loads of tarts and fruity sorts, curries and dipping things to be had:
The posh toffs over at Norder Hall – the gaff belonging to the old man of my fellow blogger Laura Norder – will be hosting a feast.
Only those with an annual income over £150,000 will be allowed to attend. So that’s just Lord Norder and his cronies:
We’ll be having a blind food tasting.
You can try some mystery foods and if you don’t throw up you get to keep the food you’ve tasted:
I know someone who’s had a go at that already and was up all night chundering into the bog.
There will be cooking demonstration by several professional chefs and chefettes. There’s even talk of some of the big name cookery people coming up from Birmingham, if they can find their way.
Personally, I’ll believe when I sees it.
Highlight on Saturday will be a cook-off between Diana Spooned (left) and her two daughters – Daphne (centre) and Delilah (right) – who will demonstrate a triple-handed, three-course piece of cheffing. It will be a bit like last year’s, probably:
Unfortunately, the big BBQ has been cancelled.
Last evening, the giant BBQ machine imported from Australia especially for Feed Your Faces got out of control a bit and the ensuing inferno spread rapidly across the village green.
Although the fire brigade was called, the villagist scout hut was badly damaged to the point of demolition:
As a result, the fire brigade has banned all outdoor BBQ-ing activity for the duration of the festival.
So, that’s that then.
Come, Feed Your Faces.
I’ll be in the boozer feeding my own chops with chips and cheese ‘n onion crisps.
